Wednesday, April 25, 2007

The anti-SPUNK

At One Weigh Or Another, they have something called "SPUNKS." It's basically when someone notices you've lost weight and gives you a compliment.

I've had my share of those over the past year and a half, but yesterday was a first.

An anti-SPUNK.

I got a call in my office, right before I left for the day. It was from a lady who is in my book club, and she wanted to complain about Walmart's new practice of handling checks.

Apparently, now when you write them a check, they give you a receipt similar to one from a credit or debit card. She was not amused. (I guess she never heard of Check 21). Anyway, she called the number the clerk gave her if she had any questions, and she said she kept getting disconnected by the computerized phone system.

When she called back to complain to the store manager, she was offended by the lewd content of the on-hold music.

All that to say, she wanted me to "investigate" and "write an editorial" about the matters.

Believe it or not, this is a fairly normal phone conversation around here. Lots of complaints and conspiracy theorists.

Then the call got weird.

She started off saying how glad she was to have spoken to me, "That pretty brunette" who comes to book club.

"Thank you," I replied.

"That chubby little brunette."

Huh?

Since when is it acceptable in polite society to call someone you know as a passing acquaintance "chubby?"

It's been a LONG time since someone has made a comment about my weight - like, maybe junior high?

I didn't know what to say. I wanted to say, "Yeah, you should've seen me about 75 pounds ago," but I didn't.

I just wished her a good day, and got on with mine.

Chubby brunette, indeed. I ought to bleach my hair before next month's meeting.

9 comments:

Lissete said...

How Rude!!!

doodlebugmom said...

Ugh. It is not acceptable. She is rude and out of line. Or maybe she thought she was giving you a compliment in weirdo sorta way. :/

Melissa said...

Yeah, Linda, like it was better than saying "Obese brunette" which used to be more accurate.

Valerie said...

that's like the time i was asked if i was pregnant. nope, i said, just fat.

she whacked ME in the shoulder.

whatever.

next meeting, bring her some of AMs leftover Easter candy...y'know, cuz you chubbies don't need all the candy.

bees-natch. (a nicer way of saying beeatch)

Anonymous said...

I know this has nothing to do with the subject at hand but I wanted to tell you and it's 1:00 a.m. (I know you don't want that I should ring you at this hour.)

I'm pretty desperate to see a certain SNL sketch with Will Ferrell from right after Princess Di died in '97. The one where it was "More Songs for People Who are Dead" or something like that. Did you see it? I can't find it online anywhere!

Melissa said...

Yes, Amanda, I saw it once upon a time. Have you tried YouTube? I tried iTunes, and no help. I have a Best of Will Ferrell, but it's not on there. There may be a volume 2 I don't have yet, though.

My poor mom had the "are you pregnant" thing happen to her, Valerie. My brothers (her youngest kids) were about three years old at the time.

Why do people just say whatever comes to their minds?

Anonymous said...

Yes, I have tried YouTube and I have failed.

:(

Heather {Desperately Seeking Sanity} said...

there was once a very large woman who said i was looking pregnant... now i will admit that the ensemble i chose to wear for the day was not the most flattering, however, i can't begin to tell you what i wanted to say to her...

i prefer pleasantly plump over chubby... :)

Anonymous said...

Um, excuse me?! How rude of her!